Why Do We Not Tell?

Four out of every five women have been abused sexually. If not outrightly penetrated, fingered or violated in some other way. But, as popular as this condition is, it’s not a popular conversation.

We’ll be highlighting some reasons why people do not speak up about abuse in this article.

1. You are ashamed: For most women, the ugly experience with your abuser/abusers leave you feeling less of yourself, almost worthless. For this, we battle with low self-esteem and identity crisis. How then can a person who feels so low, tell someone about what they have been through? The first fear is that if people find out, they’ll also see you the way you see yourself. As worthless. So, we don’t tell. We sit on the memories and try to live a normal life.

2. You have not forgiven: It will be wicked to claim that to forgive your abuser is easy. Take for example, a girl whose abuser was her relative, and she has to see him again and again for the rest of her life. No-one knows what she’s been through, even he acts like it never happened. And she walks about in the darkness of the memories that linger in her heart. Unforgiving and bitter that the man can be normal when she’s torn to pieces. It will take a jolt from heaven to get her to speak up. If she’s not planing a revenge on him, then she’ll be looking for some other way to ease her pain. But, she’ll not tell her story.

3. You don’t know who to tell: This is a popular situation. One would suggest, your mother, or your sister or a friend. But in your heart, you know these people and you can just picture their reactions. So you bottle it up. Some women have even opened up to someone who used it against them. For this, they coiled back into their covenant of silence. Finding someone who can handle your story is no easy task.

Telling your story is a major part of getting healing from sexual abuse. It lightens the load on your heart and gives room for your soul to see the light.

No one should be rushed into speaking out, it has to be at her own time. For some, it takes a few months others a few years. But whenever you find the courage to speak out, do it and don’t stop till you have totally unburdened your soul.

Thank you for reading!




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